Monday, April 25, 2011

"Cheer up! Be happy!"

I don't get it when people say this. You might have shared a part of your life with them that is causing you pain or worry, and they'll sagely say, "Cheer up!"

You're like Duh, if I knew how to do that, wouldn't I have done it already? In private, on my own? Without baring my soul to You?

Have you also noticed, when they give you this wise piece of advice, some of these people will look restless, as if they can't wait to be rid of you or the subject.

Another, even worse reply is 'Be happy.' A woman is talking about how she may have been wrong in her way of thinking or doing things for most of her life, and asks if she is doomed, and what does her friend say? 'Be happy.'

Oh! I should be happy! Wonderful! Thanks for letting me know. What would I have done without your suggestion?

When they give you this advice, don't let them go there. Follow it up with a single-word question: 'How?'

Let them tell you how to cheer up, how to be happy. Let them give you pointers, techniques, how-tos in steps one-two-three. And if you're not satisfied with their answers, follow up with further questions: how? why? what?

Who knows, these wise owls may also know the answers to the other great questions such as 'What is Life?' 'Who is God?' and 'Why me?'


Anonymous said...

Good one, Hash! I agree. I haven't had too many instances of this happen to me but when it does its quite annoying.

Ameeta said...

Would 'Ah! I see your point, but maybe you should move on,' help? ;)

Hasmita said...

This would be great, though, of course, not many of us are lucky enough to have such kind and giving friends :)

Arpita said...

Quite true! Everyone is like bothered about giving advice, because that is all they can do. Even they do not really know how to face the problems in the face, as you correctly point out.